Dear Carol, You wish your parents talked to you more. You wish your mom and dad would just love you for you, and not for what you do. You wih they could have let you greive. However, throughout all of this, the Lord was writing a different story. One of immense grace and kindness, where He never left you alone. He was alway with you and taught you that He is with you as you walk through deep waters. He showed you love, deep, real love in so many way. In the word, people, even Christian, have a joy that is not very deep. It is a joy that can be taken away. I think you've taught me over the years that real joy is surrendering to your love. It is knowing you. Lord, I trust you. I praise you. Praise the Lord! May my praise join with the other saints to declare your worthiness.

Lilly has been a dear friend to me. Her spirit and her presence feel so safe and like I'm in a hug. I think it's because her walk with the Lord has been sincere and genuine. Just as Joy and Jackie's, and Eden's. I feel so lucky to have always been with brothers and sisters whose love for the Lord is not a facade. They are not hiding anything. What a privilege.

The moments that are hardest with the Lord are those of surrender. When He is asking me to do something or give up something I don't think I can. I want to hold on so tightly it feels like I'm going to get robe burn, but still that feeling is somehow more comfortable than letting go. It's the moments when He asks me to receive Him as my whole satisfaction, and my heart just sighs and clenches tighter. Lord, don't let me go. Come again in your mercy and grace and I would unclench my heart to you.

Hello! What a happy happenstance you stumbled upon this place! I hope it would be what you need today-maybe the words would bring you the joy of the dappled sun in the trees, or the melancholy yet refreshing sprinkle of rain on a warm spring day. However you are, I hope these words can transport you to the most wonderful place I know- the safe haven which is the Savior's breast. May you abide there now and forever more.

Dove was just shy of being 12. This meant she was still 11 on the cusp of being 12, but also afraid of turning 12, and wanted to hold it at far away as possible, like a healthy person picking up a dirty kleenex. Being eleven meant being allowed to cuddle under a blanket when she said the wrong thing again at school and eating cookies with root beer at the end of a long week to forget the mental gymnastics of balancing school and friends. Yes, twelve meant you needed to be someone and Dove very much didn't know who she wanted to be. Joy, I'm sad. I don't see anything good in me, and when I do, it goes away so quickly. The Lord's plan never changes for you. I want so badly to do all these big things for Him, but all He asks of me is to come. To come to Him just as I am. Story ideas -pride and dishonesty -not being self-aware Antagonists dishonesty insecurity that they are not the best Protagonist Journey of being insecure, and doubtful to firm To go through ascension one must go through cruxifiction Instead of despair find comfort in prayer

Another week. It seems at the beginning of a new year, the idea of possibilities and dreams can overwhelm and dibilitate one's hopes. This week I found myself feeling despair and hopelessness often. It seems like God has plans, but I continually feel paralyzed due to despair and hopelessness. I dream of being someone who can stand solidly for the Lord, but my character is weak. My flesh is week. However, the Lord reminded me and was my hope this week. He is the gospel. The gospel is not a one time thing. It is something we need to tell ourselves when the days grow weary and the moments grow cold. The Lord is always new. He is always resurrection life. Jesus, thank you You turn my despair into prayer. Lord, I get hopeless so often but thank you you save me again and again. Some moments from this week: Singing with Philip Going to the children's museum with Eden, Jeremiah, and William Resuming our Bible study Telling Mrs. Rasdell that it was Anne's birthday

Grace is a beautiful things For us to receive Freely Always Abundant Then how come we feel lacking? Because we do not ask Jesus, I ask for grace today. Show me the limits of myself Then grace pours down like a mighty stream A gentle whisper A new life